Sex Before Marriage?

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Hi J____,

Thank you for your kind words about our web site. Iswasandwiilbe.com is dedicated to proclaiming the sovereignty of God in all things both good and evil. For this reason it will never become a popular site in this age, but for those who are given eyes to see and ears to hear, the knowledge of God’s total sovereignty makes situations like the one you are dealing with much more understandable and therefore easier to endure.

You say your friend believes sex outside of marriage is okay, and you wonder if there are any scriptures I can give you to help your friend.

The truth is that all of this is all happening with your friend for your sake at this time. God is actually using your friend’s actions to teach you that He has created the wicked you for the day of evil in you. Your friend’s actions are typical of us all at our own appointed time. We are all guilty of spiritual adultery and spiritual fornication and having spiritual sex outside of spiritual marriage. We are all “children of disobedience”, children of “the prince of the power of the air,” before we become children of obedience to our heavenly Father.

2Co 4:15  For all things [your friend’s physical fornication or adultery] are for your sakes, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many redound to the glory of God.

Pro 16:4  The LORD hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked [in me, you and your friend] for the day of evil [which we will all live within].

Eph 2:2  Wherein in time past ye [me, you and your friend] walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience:
Eph 2:3  Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.

The fact that you and I have never committed physical murder, or any other particular sin, does not change the fact that we are all guilty of those sins “by nature.” Only those who come to see and give account of this fact will ever know God and Jesus Christ who say that this is true:

Luk 11:49  Therefore also said the wisdom of God, I will send them prophets and apostles, and [some] of them they shall slay and persecute:
Luk 11:50  That the blood of all the prophets, which was shed from the foundation of the world, may be required of this generation;
Luk 11:51  From the blood of Abel unto the blood of Zacharias, which perished between the altar and the temple: verily I say unto you, It shall be required of this generation.

“The blood of all the prophets” is the blood of Christ.

Mat 25:31  When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory:
Mat 25:32  And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth [his] sheep from the goats:
Mat 25:33  And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.
Mat 25:34  Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
Mat 25:35  For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
Mat 25:36  Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
Mat 25:37  Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed [thee]? or thirsty, and gave [thee] drink?
Mat 25:38  When saw we thee a stranger, and took [thee] in? or naked, and clothed [thee]?
Mat 25:39  Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
Mat 25:40  And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.
Mat 25:41  Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:
Mat 25:42  For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink:
Mat 25:43  I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.
Mat 25:44  Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?
Mat 25:45  Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me.
Mat 25:46  And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.

All that ever has been or ever will be done, was done to Christ, be it good or evil. When King Saul was persecuting David, he was persecuting Christ, and when Jonathan helped David, he was helping Christ. The same thing is true today. We all persecute Christ before we serve Him. We are all King Saul before we become King David.

The “coming of the Son of Man” and the separating of the nations at judgment “is now on the house of God”, because His throne, and His kingdom and His dwelling are all within:

1Pe 4:17  For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God: and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God?

1Co 3:16  Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?
1Co 3:17  If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are.

Luk 17:20  And when he was demanded of the Pharisees, when the kingdom of God should come, he answered them and said, The kingdom of God cometh not with observation:
Luk 17:21  Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you.

“This generation” is those who “read and understand” and have been given the ability to see the truth of these words. Those who deny that they are guilty of the blood of Christ and all the prophets, are the ninety-and-nine who need no repentance, the well who need no physician, and those who say that they see, and do not need to be healed of their blindness:

Luk 15:7  I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.

Mar 2:17  When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

Joh 9:39  And Jesus said, For judgment I am come into this world, that they which see not might see; and that they which see might be made blind.
Joh 9:40  And [some] of the Pharisees which were with him heard these words, and said unto him, Are we blind also?
Joh 9:41  Jesus said unto them, If ye were blind, ye should have no sin: but now ye say, We see; therefore your sin remaineth.

Please do not think that I have no concern for your fiend. Nothing is further from the Truth. But if you and I have “had our conversation [Greek: anastrepho – behavior, way of life] in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others,” then your friend will also be required to endure that part of her walk. We will all “live by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.

Mat 4:4  But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.

Eph 2:3  Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.

Your friend, just like you and me, will be delivered up to death, but she will also be justified, in her own time. It will all be accomplished through the fiery words of “every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God,” both the good and the evil:

1Co 3:13  Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is.
1Co 3:14  If any man’s work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward.
1Co 3:15  If any man’s work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.

None of this is to be understood as being literal or as having to physically commit every sin committed since Adam. It is to be understood as “this generation… which reads and understands,” realizing that it is spiritually “guilty of all the blood of all the prophets” and the blood of Christ. That is how we “live by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.”

If you have read much on this site at all, then you are aware that turning the grace of God into a license to commit sin will be severely judged and rewarded in kind. But judgment does not change the fact that “all things are of God.”

1Co 3:21  Therefore let no man glory in men. For all things are yours;
1Co 3:22  Whether Paul, or Apollos, or Cephas, or the world, or life, or death, or things present, or things to come; all are yours;
1Co 3:23  And ye are Christ’s; and Christ is God’s.

2Co 5:18  And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;

Eph 1:11  In whom also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestinated according to the purpose of him who worketh all things after the counsel of his own will:

Here is a wonderful and comforting promise. It is just as applicable to this situation with your friend as it is to any other ‘thing’.

Rom 8:28  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

Remember:

2Co 4:15  For all things [are] for your sakes, that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many redound to the glory of God.

I feel sure that you already know that your friend cannot come to God unless His spirit first drags her to Him.

Joh 6:44  No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw [Greek: hello – drag] him: and I will raise him up at the last day.

When that day arrives, your friend will be chastened to forsake ungodliness and worldly lusts and to live godly lives in this present world.

Tit 2:11  For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men,
Tit 2:12  Teaching [Greek: paideuo – chastening] us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world;

God’s grace will one day chasten your friend to the point that she will loath the sins she now thinks are bringing her pleasure. Grace is not a dead noun, but an extremely active and chastening verb. Read the letter entitled What Is Grace on iswasandwillbe. com. God’s grace is the answer to your dilemma with your friend. When God decides to drag her to Himself, she will find His persuasiveness irresistible.

In the meantime just realize that physical sex outside of marriage is a sin, but it is spiritual adultery and spiritual fornication that God is most concerned with in us all. Christ told the woman caught in adultery, “Neither do I condemn thee. Go, and sin no more.” The self-righteous Jews never heard such wonderful words, and the sin of self-righteousness is far more insidious than that of overt fornication and adultery. We are all guilty of both by nature, and will all experience God’s wrath on those sins, at the appointed time. It is all already written in His book:

Psa 139:16  Thine eyes did see mine unformed substance; And in thy book they were all written, Even the days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was none of them.

Truly the Lord is “working all things after the counsel of His own will.”

There is a paper already on iswasandwillbe.com bearing on this subject. Here is the link for that letter:

Satan’s Seed

Read that letter, and if you still have a question, then please feel free to get back to me.

Your brother in Christ,

Mike

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