Handling Alcoholic Relatives

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Hi E____,
Thanks for your question concerning your brother. I have just such a brother myself. My brother is a cocaine addict and will steal you blind if he is around you for any period of time and has spent many years in prison as a result of his drug use and its consequences.
He has stolen my air tools and my compressor on two occasions. It amounted to thousands of dollars worth of equipment. I make my living and feed my family with those tools, so I told my brother what I would tell a spiritual brother who was ignoring God’s word:

1Co 5:1  It is actually reported that there is fornication among you, and such fornication as is not even among the Gentiles, that one of you hath his father’s wife.
1Co 5:2  And ye are puffed up, and did not rather mourn, that he that had done this deed might be taken away from among you.
1Co 5:3  For I verily, being absent in body but present in spirit, have already as though I were present judged him that hath so wrought this thing,
1Co 5:4  in the name of our Lord Jesus, ye being gathered together, and my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus,
1Co 5:5  to deliver such a one unto Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
1Co 5:6  Your glorying is not good. Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump?

God’s love is what we call ‘tough love.’ God does not tolerate sedition or rebellion in His body, which is His church. Your brother and mine are outside the body of Christ, but the principle is the same. I have told my brother that he is no longer welcome around my home and around my children.
It is not love to help a brother or a sister to remain as they are. It is love to turn them over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh that the spirit might be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
You are in our prayers. I know what you are going through because I too, am enduring that same trial. Turn your brother over to Satan. In doing so you are turning him over to God. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God, but it is necessary that we all do so in order to have burned out of us all that must be gathered up and bound in bundles to be burned in the day of the harvest, which is the day of judgment which is now on the house of God.

Heb 10:31  It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.
Mat 13:24  Another parable set he before them, saying, The kingdom of heaven is likened unto a man that sowed good seed in his field:
Mat 13:25  but while men slept, his enemy came and sowed tares also among the wheat, and went away.
Mat 13:26  But when the blade sprang up and brought forth fruit, then appeared the tares also.
Mat 13:27  And the servants of the householder came and said unto him, Sir, didst thou not sow good seed in thy field? whence then hath it tares?
Mat 13:28  And he said unto them, An enemy hath done this. And the servants say unto him, Wilt thou then that we go and gather them up?
Mat 13:29  But he saith, Nay; lest haply while ye gather up the tares, ye root up the wheat with them.
Mat 13:30  Let both grow together until the harvest: and in the time of the harvest I will say to the reapers, Gather up first the tares, and bind them in bundles to burn them; but gather the wheat into my barn.
1Pe 4:17  For the time is come for judgment to begin at the house of God: and if it begin first at us, what shall be the end of them that obey not the gospel of God?

Heb 10:31  It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.

But it will all one day produce the repentance that is necessary, and when that day comes we will love our brothers even as we do now. Godly love produces Godly results:

2Co 2:6  Sufficient to such a one is this punishment which was inflicted by the many;
2Co 2:7  so that contrariwise ye should rather forgive him and comfort him, lest by any means such a one should be swallowed up with his overmuch sorrow.
2Co 2:8  Wherefore I beseech you to confirm your love toward him.
2Co 2:9  For to this end also did I write, that I might know the proof of you, whether ye are obedient in all things.

This man had brought forth the fruits of repentance. Neither of our brothers have yet done that as yet, and in my case I will not have my brother around my home or my children until I see a change in his heart. When that day comes I will be the first to welcome him back into my home and into my heart where he is already.
I hope this is of some help to you. God commands us to put the leavening out of our lives and out of our midst. Here is how we know we love our brothers:

1Jn 5:2  By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God, and keep his commandment s.
1Jn 5:3  For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous.

God’s commandments are not easy to keep, and when we do so we are called heartless and cold- hearted. But turning our brothers over to Satan is love when it is needed.
Your brother in Christ,
Mike

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